Reply - Tuna Helper

I received a reply today.

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My original letter to Tuna Helper from August 19, 2010.

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The reply:



I'm completely disappointed with this reply back... for starters, it didn't even make reference to Tuna Helper, and I had to take a good 10 seconds to think about which letter it was they were responding to.

Zero effort went into this reply. Why even bother to reply if all you're going to do is copy and paste some company pre-approved text into the document? I was rather proud of my proposed idea from my letter...

I wonder what the process is for reviewing and processing the letters that they get. I'm assuming that there aren't all that many letters making their way back to General Mills to where they'd be unable to sit down and write out a quick 5 minute reply that has a little individuality to it.

Supposing they have one person on staff whose full time job is to process incoming letters, they could handle reading and replying to 6 letters an hour, giving them a personal response rate of 12480 letters a year. I've got my doubts that they've even got that many consumer affair letters coming in, but maybe they do.

Ah well, you can't win them all I suppose.

Dear Tuna Helper

Dear Tuna Helper,

I am writing you today to tell you of how much I enjoy your fine Tuna Helper branded products. Being a bachelor with no formal culinary training, I find that taking the time and effort to prepare a meal from scratch is normally a lost cause, and ends up being infinitely more expensive than throwing down a Lincoln for a box of your stuff and whatever prepackaged meat that it requires.

Thank you for making my life easier.

However, I would like to forward a suggestion to your team for consideration to better accommodate folks like myself. Think of it as a brainstorming idea... what you do with it is your call, but if you do decide to credit me for it, I'd be flattered.

Why not just include a pouch of tuna in the box? You've got the pasta, you've got the seasoning... one more won't hurt you. I've seen these soft packed baggies of tuna out there, and I'm sure it wouldn't be all too difficult to form a partnership with Bumble Bee or Chicken of the Sea to help make the sale. My reasons for this is sort of multi-intentioned, so bear with me as I explain.

1. I have a hard time working a can opener. I'm not suffering from any sort of degenerative muscle disease (like that thing Michael J Fox has) that makes me incapable of performing the task, but I usually have a to take a good 3 or 4 attempts to get the can open. Then there's the danger of possibly cutting myself on the tin... not good. Using those tuna pouches would eliminate a lot of that problem.

2. I'd be able to use the 15 Items Or Less checkout lane more often. Did you know that in order to buy all the ingredients for Tuna Helper, I usually need 4 items? 2 cans of tuna, 1 thing of milk, 1 box of your stuff. But if the tuna was included, bingo! I just freed up two of my 15 items. That'd be another couple boxes of your fine Tuna Helper. I'd get to use that VIP lane every time, no doubt!

That's about all I have to say right now, but I want to thank you for keeping up the great work. Your Tuna Helper has always been a favorite of mine.

Craving some Classic Creamy Broccoli Tuna Helper right now,

Daniel