Reply - Dick's Sporting Goods

A reply from DICK'S Sporting Goods...

---

Click here to read my original letter to DICK'S Sporting Goods from December 16, 2010.

---

The reply:

Gotta love the form letter approach... I still don't quite understand why they even bother wasting the forty-four cents on postage for these things.

I see a couple things here... first, that Mary Jo and I are on a first name basis. Second, that the DICK in DICK'S Sporting Goods is all capitalized. Not that I'm implying anything with that or anything. It's just when you use phrases like "ensure our customer's satisfaction", "truly appreciate your time" and "value your patronage" all in the same letter, and neglect to sign the damn thing, it kind of strikes me as contradicting.

I'm still betting that if I walk into this location and try to browse their dart selection, not a thing would be changed. Come to mention it, the darts I had pictured with the original letter that I wrote to DICK'S is of a set I snagged from Sears... and it probably would retail at DICK'S for closer to $45 as opposed to the $8 I spent at Sears.

Ah well, you can't win them all.

Reply - Sharp Electronics

Another letter, this time from Sharp.

---

Click here to read my original letter to Sharp Electronics from December 29, 2010.

---

Their reply:


Now that is all sorts of classy right there... it seems that the manual for the particular typewriter I bought is extinct, but Donna Rice at Sharp sent me a 90-page copy of one for the PA-3140, nicely bound in a red folder with a clear glossy cover. I'm not sure of the age of the typewriter I've got, but there's a date on the inside of this manual indicating it could be from the 1980's.

There is some excellent info in the manual, too. I'll be putting this to use when I go to type up my next letter.

Reply - Binaca

A continuation of some replies that I received over the past week and a half.

---

Click here to read my original letter to Binaca from January 2, 2011.

---

Their reply:


I like it. The parent company for Binaca is called Dr. Fresh Inc, and I think they're a fairly small setup in terms of how many companies they do business with. They do sell direct, which I can always respect, and they didn't even have any specialized letterhead... but they did take the time to respond to my letter which goes a long way with me. I'd say this is a good response. Perhaps I'll invest in a case of their breath freshener...

Reply - Comcast

I received a few replies today... here's the first.

---

Click here to read my letter to Comcast from December 1, 2010.

---

The reply:


To the credit of Comcast, this guy did try calling me a few times after he looked my account up. I didn't answer as I didn't recognize the number, but was invited over voicemail to call back to discuss my issues... even though I didn't have much more to discuss. It was merely a letter of venting, explaining what my frustrations were. I wanted to make them aware of what hoops I had to jump through.

But. This letter is lame. It says if they don't hear from me by 1/7, they'd consider my issue "resolved"... although the issue I have is actually their issue.

And what date did they actually get around to dropping the letter in the mail? 1/10. I received it today, 1/13. The letter was sent after their cutoff date for considering it resolved. Glad to see they can chalk this one up to a successful resolution because they're slow at droppin' things in the mail. Good job, Comcast...

Mmmmm, corporate America.

Reply - Home Depot

I received a reply.

---

Click here to read my original letter to Home Depot from December 3, 2010.

---

Their reply:


I'm a little disappointed with this one, as they say they were unsuccessful in contacting me as they only had my address. Yet I find that a letter sent to an address is indeed a good way to make contact and confront issues such as the one I brought up with them.

I don't really have any open concerns with them, and just wanted to let them know that they didn't put that much effort in trying to help me out with my search for a laminate. That said, I do appreciate the apology though. The signature on this thing is legit, so I'll consider this a genuine letter.

Reply - Bed Bath & Beyond

I received a response today.

---

Click here to read my original letter to Bed Bath & Beyond from November 1, 2010.

---

The reply:

Looks to be a genuine reply to me... perhaps I'll drop her an email. Although now the problem is that I moved 2500 miles away since receiving this reply, so who knows if they'd be able to help me resolve my can opener challenges.

Reply - U. S. Geological Survey

I received a reply today.

---

Click here to read my original letter to the U. S. Geological Survey from October 22, 2010.

---

The reply:




Excellent reply back from Michael Blanpied there... as he mentioned, I did neglect to include the printout of the maps I posted on my initial post. I realized this as soon as I dropped the letter in the mailbox. I left it laying facedown on my desk, but opted to not send out a second letter. I figured he knew what I was talking about, and sure enough he did.

I wasn't aware that all earthquakes start out the same... that supports the idea that it's pretty much impossible to predict the magnitude of a quake. He does say there are early warning systems in place in a few locations, although it sounds like California has yet to secure the financial backing to deploy one here.

Basically, Michael gave me some great resources to work with. Click here for a copy of the article from the journal Seismological Research Letters that he included.

The office building where I work, my office is not on the ground floor. I don't have easy access to the outside, either. There are large metal beams holding this structure up, and nails sticking out of the underside of the floorboards all over the place. I've been in this building when an earthquake has hit, and it was unnerving to say the least. My boss, an older gentlemen of small stature that doesn't move very quickly at all, hurdled over his desk and sprinted out of his office door, and down the stairs with lightning speed. I was pretty much right behind him, and all I could imagine was the beams collapsing, the staircase crushing us, and it all being finalized as the floorboards from upstairs came crashing down, nails piercing our twitching bodies.

Ungh. I think about this every time I go into and out of work.

Very informative reply. Thanks, USGS!

Reply - The Crown & Goose

I know that I've been MIA this week, and didn't have too much time to write any letters (what with the Man keeping me down and all), but... I received a reply today.

---

Click here to read my second original letter to The Crown & Goose from October 22, 2010.

---

Their reply:



That is some bitchin' letterhead that The Crown & Goose is using. I love paper that looks to have a bit of texture to it, and such a regal looking logo. It's hard to tell in the scan, but check out the picture below... that is one badass goose. How could you not want to dine at a place that has this goose hanging above the entryway?

The envelope was hand addressed to me, no return address on the envelope... but postmarked from Tennessee. I thought this was an excellent reply back, considering I had a more than legit complaint about the service and food last time around.

They thank me, they reprimand themselves, and they beg for another chance... nearly a perfect penance.

My first letter was to praise them about the best pork chop I had ever eaten, and I begged that they share the recipe with me, although a reply never came. I didn't mind so much, but it's a good thing they took my second letter and complaint to heart. I'd be willing to give them another try, but will probably limit future visits to dinnertime only. This letter will go down as a success in my book.

This reply also puts this project at the 50% response rate. Not bad at any rate...

Reply - Blue Angels

I received a reply from the Blue Angels.

---

Click here to read my original letter to the Blue Angels from October 4, 2010

---

I was surprised when I came home to find a 13" X 18" envelope slipped behind my screen door. Checking the return address label, it said, "Department of the Navy; Commanding Officer"... and my first thought was, "Oh God, I'm being drafted..."



Turns out, it was just a reply from the Navy's Blue Angels. No letter came with the package, but I did get some awesome things back. There were two 11" x 14" frame-quality posters, one each of Fat Albert and the six F-18's.



I also received a sticker sheet, a fold-out brochure that lists and shows the picture of every person that is part of the enlisted roster (yearbook style), and then a spectacular glossy 54 page full-color booklet highlighting what the Blue Angels do, detailed bios on the pilots along with some amazing photos.

I wasn't expecting this much stuff. Sending out things like this can't be cheap... postage alone was $7.90. So, the downside is that it's my tax dollars that paid for this, but the upside is that I'll be hanging onto this stuff for a long time to come. What a neat reply...

Reply - Butterball

I received a second reply today from Butterball.

---

Click here for the original letter to Butterball from September 8, 2010.
Click here for the first reply from Butterball.

---

If you scroll down to the comments of the reply, you see that Linda from Butterball found my post and left a comment there. I went ahead and responded to her via email, which went a little something like this:

Hi Linda,

Thank you very much for your positive response to my post.

I'm intrigued that you found my blog, but I suppose it's all part of the experiment. Mind if I ask how my post made its way back to you? If you prefer not to answer, no worries at all.

It's okay about the mis-read of the letter. At first I was jazzed thinking I'd get to test out my little George Foreman experiment using turkey, but then I saw what the roast actually is... and I thought it'd be a bit hard to try and toss that thing on a little 8" x 8" grill.

I'd happily accept your coupon for a Butterball turkey. While I'm a bit intimidated to try and tackle the preparation of an entire turkey on my own (I've tried before, and it has never gone well), my girlfriend is offering up her services in the preparation and cooking of the bird. She's cunning in the kitchen...

Thanks again for the follow-up. It's a sign of great customer service, and absolutely appreciated. :)

Daniel

-------------------

Glad to hear back from you!

I try to follow any Butterball mentions in social media via Google Alerts – which is how I found your post.

I’ll get a coupon off to you next week – let me know how it goes. (We’ve got step by step instructions on our website, including some videos, if you or your girlfriend get stuck.)

Linda

-------------------

The reply from Linda:



Butterball came through in the end, definitely. Thanks to Linda for sending out a $15 coupon for me to use on whole Butterball turkey... I'll be taking advantage of that, no question. Top notch customer service, right there. That's what I like. That, and Butterball turkey.

Reply - Mormons

I received a reply today from the Mormons.

---

Click here to read my original letter to the Mormons from October 11, 2010, where I gave them a copy of a photo I had taken of their San Diego Temple and asked about tours for the general public.

---

The reply:



First off, that is awesome... the Mormons want to use my photo for their Christmas card?

Daniel, the photographer for the Mormon Christmas card.

I half expected that it would've been tossed in the trash, especially because my letter to them was laced with what could be taken as subtle sarcasm. Second, I feel like a bit of a jerk now being that I mentioned Big Love. Third, I didn't put too much thought in this, but... I never considered that Mormons took to celebrating Christmas. I suppose it only makes sense, being that they believe in the Jesus.

I've known a handful of Mormons in a friend capacity. While I've taken some time to sit and question them and discuss their faith (including a few missionaries that have perhaps caught me off-guard), a few things that always stands out is their ability to socialize, their ability to smile and make light of most anything, and their ability to make me feel unexplainably uncomfortable in my own skin.

I'm not trying to bash Mormonism. I was raised in a non-denominational Christian congregation which I've long since separated from, come from a Catholic family, and my closest friend from San Diego is a practicing Muslim. I've been taught and practice a lot of tolerance, even though I define myself as Agnostic, borderline Atheist.

I paused several times before I sent out the original letter, honestly done in the spirit of fun... and here I get this genuine response back from Bruce Olsen, the President of the San Diego Temple. AND he has offered to personally give me a tour of the place, which is entirely unheard of for a Mormon Temple.

So now I'm faced with... do I call him? Or do I let it be?

I want to call because he gave me the time of day by writing a sincere letter back to me, is giving me the honor of using my photo for their Christmas card, and he is willing to give me a tour of what I think is considered a very sacred place for his people... and I want to see what it looks like on the inside.

I don't want to call because I don't want to have anyone try to convince me that Mormonism is the way to go, I don't want to have people in bicycle helmets knocking down my door every week, and I don't want to have it turn into a debate on Mormonism vs Agnosticism.

I'm torn. What would you do?

Reply - Ready Pac Produce

I received this reply on Friday... but I didn't get a chance to sit down at a computer for more than 2 minutes up until today. It's kind of nice, these breaks from technology.

---

Click here to read my original letter to Ready Pac Produce from September 21, 2010.

---

The reply... well, there wasn't actually a returned letter to scan in. What I got was a brochure titled "Consumer Information", a 3-page packet that states their Product Ingredient Listing, and a manufacturer's coupon for one free Ready Pac Fresh-Cut Produce Item valued up to $4.99. All this was sort of stuffed into an envelope, but I don't mind as the coupon more than covers the cost of my fruit salad that I had to toss.

So, just because, I'm going to put up the FAQ's from the consumer info guide... it talks a lot about the "technology" that goes into processing these things. This intrigues me.



I'd say it was a decent reply, although an actual letter would've still been appreciated. Still, thanks to Ready Pac.

Reply - Flying Hills Elementary School

I received a reply...

---

Click here to read my original letter to Flying Hills Elementary School from September 14, 2010.

---

The reply:



This one came as a bit of a surprise to me... I figured that this would've been crumpled into a ball and tossed in the trash bin.

My letter was forwarded onto their Child Nutrition Services department for the Cajon Valley School District, and lo... the square pizza of my youth has been revealed as Red Barron brand frozen pizza. I never would've seen that one coming.

Interestingly enough, I enjoy Red Barron pizza very much... and most recently, I've taken to buying their frozen flatbread branded pizzas sold under the name of Freschetta. I eat about one a month.

I'd say this was one awesome response...

Reply - Butterball

I received a reply today.

---

Click to read my original letter to Butterball from September 8, 2010.

---

The reply:


Butterball... I hate to say it, but you kind of failed on this one.

I did not contact them about their Butterball Turkey Breast Roast, as they said I did. In fact, I contacted them about their "Fresh Turkey Breast cuts", and went into at length about how I prefer to personally marinade fresh poultry and then grill it on my single-serving George Foreman grill.



Looking up what their roasts are, I think I'd have a difficult time trying to marinade and cook up this thing on my little George Foreman. That... is a three pound log of turkey.



Now that's more like it... let's look it up and see where it's available...


Damn you, Butterball...

Reply - Target

I received a reply today.

---

My original letter to Target from September 16, 2010.

---

The reply:


I'd say that's a good reply... I didn't suspect they'd be able to do too much about it, but so long as they pass the info along to their purchasing team so as to help me remedy my premature shin balding problem, that's good enough for me.

Reply - Post-it Note

I received a reply today.

---

My original letter to 3M about their Post-it Notes from September 17, 2010.

---

The reply:

What I don't get is that a company like 3M took the time to hand write my name and address on the envelope, but they sent me a fairly lame form letter in response that didn't address much of anything... like how I was misinformed about their Post-it Note recycling program. I mean, I wasn't expected to be taken seriously, but the effort isn't even there.

I kind of want my damn Post-it Notes back now. What did they end up doing with them?

Oh well.

Reply - Tuna Helper

I received a reply today.

---

My original letter to Tuna Helper from August 19, 2010.

---

The reply:



I'm completely disappointed with this reply back... for starters, it didn't even make reference to Tuna Helper, and I had to take a good 10 seconds to think about which letter it was they were responding to.

Zero effort went into this reply. Why even bother to reply if all you're going to do is copy and paste some company pre-approved text into the document? I was rather proud of my proposed idea from my letter...

I wonder what the process is for reviewing and processing the letters that they get. I'm assuming that there aren't all that many letters making their way back to General Mills to where they'd be unable to sit down and write out a quick 5 minute reply that has a little individuality to it.

Supposing they have one person on staff whose full time job is to process incoming letters, they could handle reading and replying to 6 letters an hour, giving them a personal response rate of 12480 letters a year. I've got my doubts that they've even got that many consumer affair letters coming in, but maybe they do.

Ah well, you can't win them all I suppose.

Reply - Vons

I got a reply today.

---

My original letter to Vons from August 31, 2010.

---

The reply:


I love getting personal letters like this back. I know that Larry took the extra time to sit down and read what I wrote... that sort of extra customer service is very important to me. And true to fact, my name was indeed corrected on my card... I was caught off-guard when the cashier pronounced my name without any hesitation. I had to do a bit of a double-take.

Thanks, Vons. Keep it up.

Reply - Palmolive

This is my second reply from today.

---

My original letter to Palmolive from August 15, 2010.

---

The reply:


This one amused me. It was a form letter, but along with a voucher for a free bottle of Ajax dish liquid (which I'll give a try), I also got an envelope labeled "With Compliments" that was jam packed full of coupons. They are as follows:
- $.40 off any Softsoap Liquid Hand Soap
- $.75 off any Softsoap Body Wash
- $.40 off any Palmolive Dish Liquid
- $.75 off any Irish Spring Body Wash
- $.50 off any Suavitel Fabric Conditioner or Dryer Sheets
- $.40 off any Palmolive Automatic Dishwasher Detergent
- $.75 off any Colgate Kids Toothpaste
- $.75 off any Speed Stick Antiperspirant/Deodorant
- $1.00 off any Colgate Total or Colgate Max Fresh Toothpaste
- $.75 off any Lady Speed Stick Antiperspirant/Deodorant
- $.50 off any Murphy Oil Soap Product
- $.50 off any Colgate Wisp Mini-Brush with Freshening Bead
- $.75 off any Colgate Manual Toothbrush
- $.30 off any Multipack of Irish Spring Bar Soap

Awesome. Altogether, that's worth about $10.49 in savings. I'll take it. A success with Colgate-Palmolive... although, now I'm sort of limited in being able to write about how Irish Spring leaves an off-white stain on the soap counter in my bathroom seeing that Colgate is the parent company for all these brands, but maybe I'll still give it a try...

Reply - United Airlines

I received a couple replies today... this is the first.

---

My original letter to United Airlines from August 18, 2010.

---

The reply:


It's a real reply, and has a decent comp accompanying it, but I'm still very anti-United at this point. I have flown over 100 times, and I consider that flight to have been the absolute worst I'd been on. I will say that I'll make use of the $150 certificate, but that'll be the last time United sees me if I have anything to say about it. Never again will I do a coast-to-coast flight with them.